The First Book.

The book of “?”

And so it came to pass that in the second post of the thirteenth page of the I Believe In God thread, Hambubba did accidentally invent the Church of the Clueless.

And Four Kitties was first to join, and implemented the Ritual Flinging Up of Hands.

And Cervus tried something with hats that never caught on.

And Noemi brought forth cookies, and they were good.

And Nonny mentioned coffee.

And the Clueless spilled the coffee and dropped the cookies, because they weren't paying attention when they were ritually Flinging Up Their Hands.

And Sister Ray brought hot chocolate and tea, for those who don't like coffee.

And Double Jeopardy began the Officially Accepted Scriptures of the Clueless, in which it is written: "Wherever two or more of you are gathered, there will be cookies also."

And in the thirty-first post of the thirteenth page of the I Believe In God thread, Hambubba began making small noises and dancing in circles, and thus expanded the ritual.

And the musician was ignored by many, and he was snarky.

In the second post of the fourteenth page of the I Believe In God thread did Nonny state the fundamental truth of the clueless: "No one has a clue, no one will ever have a clue, and anyone who things he has a clue just doesn't have a clue." And there was much eating of cookies.

And the musician continued to be snarky.

And High Priest Hambubba tried to talk Grouchy Pie into flinging her socks, yet he was rebuffed.

And in the third post of the fifteenth page of the I Believe In God thread did Nonny share the ritual chant with the rest of the Clueless: huh? wha? huh? wha? And it was good.

And musician tried to be cluelessly funny, and failed, and he was ignored by all the faithful.

In the twentieth post of the fifteenth page of the I Believe In God thread did Hambubba reveal the First Commandment of the Clueless: "Thou shalt not act like a dick." And there was much laughter.

In the seventh post of the sixteenth page of the I Believe In God thread Silas did publish the first Clueless Hymn:

quote:

---

Amazing guess! How small the cost
To give up what others find!
I once was found but now I'm lost,
Could see, but now am blind!

---

And now the Faithful Clueless had something to sing while dancing in small circles, which had been getting boring with no music.

In the twenty-ninth post of the sixteenth page of the I Believe In God thread Hambubba told the Faithful Clueless: "Thou shalt not bait the troll."

And Lo! Then came Christopher with the vacuum cleaner, and there were no more crumbs.

In the thirteenth post of the seventeenth page of the I Believe In God thread ULTRAGOTHA introduced the concept of the Malignant Ball of Energy. And MBoE was immediately acknowledged as a great acronym, and the faithful rejoiced.

In the twenty-third post of the seventeenth page of the I Believe In God thread Nonny suggested that the thread be moved to Petty Bickering. And it was done. And even though musician was told the thread was moved, he never returned.

And there was much rejoicing. And Christopher continued to vacuum the rug.

And the thread became a discussion of blood types, and all were confused, and quite Clueless.

Footnote from the Chronicler. Scholars are disputing the authenticity of this passage. Well, actually they’re disputing the authenticity of ALL of this:

And on the 30th post of the 20th page did Four Kitties write the Genesis of the Apostles, and there was much Flinging Up of Hands and Dancing in Circles. And Cookies were baked, and thus distributed, as it is written in the book of Hambubba. And refreshments were had, and subsequently deposited on computer monitors. And the ranks of the Faithful continued to Swell. So is it written, Have a Cookie.